It’s a good job that KFC is more addictive than crack, otherwise this senile old Colonel might just have ruined their advertising campaign forever. He’s sure doing a good job of not reading whatever basic words were written on a piece of paper for him. Then again, there’s a good chance he’s getting high on his own supply and all that finger lickin chicken and vegetable fat has gone straight to his head.
He certainly sounds finger lickin’ly intoxicated. Cruspy? That’s not even a word. Sanders, did they not teach you English at fast food school? Lay off that popcorn chicken. Anyway – however poor this ad read through is, he’s always going to be immortalised on the side of KFC outlets. Lucky him.
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I suppose in any other realm, a heavily armed muscular man with facepaint on, firing said weaponry would be fucking terrfying. Not here. Where do we start? He rolls like my Auntie, he dresses like a child with an unhealthy Action Man passion, and, I’m sorry, but where did that snake come from?
The only thing we do know is that he’s Born For Action. Born for Action. This would be all well and good, but the poor lad doesn’t seem to have any company. He’s probably the owner of the best defended disused quarry in the world. In his head, he thinks having made this video there’ll be a queue of hopeful women and army conscriptors waiting outside his house/barracks/shed. Somehow, I doubt it. But don’t tell him that.
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Parents and kids, it’s a difficult equation to get right at the best of times, but get it wrong and you are setting up a learning behaviour for your child to adhere to later on in life! It’s enough to make you fear for future generations.
Mothers seem to like to to put their kids in inappropriate sexual situations, dads love to get their kids acquainted with wild animals and guns. Why do some people breed?
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Sometimes you just really really need fast food
You can’t explain it, but when you get that niggling, aching urge – nothing can prevent you from satisfying your desire
Not even glass
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So THIS is how the conversation went in the run-up to Avatar
It doesn’t make me want to watch it again though…however multi-dimensional the thing was
Ok. I would if that blooper was in it
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The music makes this clip that little more special.
Do you think he ever made it home, or was he forever confined to that street in a grey UK town? And what the hell had he been drinking?
I have my doubts though. I fear he is on something stronger. Something designed to subdue horses.
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This unfortunate weatherman is never far from making headlines. And they’re not usually about rain or sunshine.
Not long ago he got the giggles live on air for unintentionally swearing. Then he got visibly offended for being called ‘Petal’.
Well, here he is again. However, this time he’s minding his own business, scratching his chin. Some people will read stuff into anything.
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I don’t know what to think of this particular story. At all.
Did he find it? Was it a policeman? Or maybe an unfortunate customs officer plucked it from his bowels during a rigorous border search.
Either way, maybe it’s better to stick to other parts of London where good old-fashioned gun crime reigns supreme.
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