Have you pulled a muscle in your back? Maybe you sprained a finger opening a tin of baked beans? Well whatever you’ve done, you deserve some money, after all, it’s not like you asked for that tin opener to be so difficult, did you?

No, it’s clearly everybody else’s fault but your own, you have a right to live without getting hurt just because you’re getting old and your body’s turning to shit. So ring these guys and get some compensation, the world owes it to you.